Leaving

So these last few weeks have been a whirlwind of activity.
We're halfway through the Mini-DTS and God is opening up so many doors and doing so many great things. We're sitting under really good teaching and the students are thriving! Praise God that He is faithful and that He sees through and works through us despite our weaknesses and failures.

I've officially handed over the communication side of things here at the base, I'm still doing a few little facebook things and working on the blog, but that side of my life is over:( I loved doing the communication, so I'm a sad to let it go, but it was time.

I'm slowly wrapping up my time here. Today it's officially 23 days until I fly out of Rarotonga. I can't believe that this chapter of my life is over. I think I cry over it every day. I've been told to grieve my time here well. I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I'm definitely grieving.

With leaving, there's a whole host of emotions that I'm not sure how to deal with. I'm having to let go of so many things, but things are super busy here, so I'm not having a lot of time to process. There are so many questions in my mind about my time here, did I do well? Was it worth it? Have I truly run the race?

The base is also going through a lot of changes, changes that leave me behind because I'm not going to be moving forward with them. So, I spend a lot of nights alone, thinking and struggling and praying, not knowing how to work through what I'm going through.

They don't teach you how to deal with this on DTS or Bible School, they don't teach you how to deal with this in church or college. There is a deep ripping at my soul, the need to say a final good-bye, but not knowing how, because the things and people I'm saying good-bye to aren't dead, they're just moving forward without me. And I'm leaving them.

I'm sorry, that was a whole lot more honest than I was intending on being, but looking at it, I don't want to take it away, because it's the truth, and I value truth.

Over the next 3 weeks, I'll keep winding down my time here, and just continue seeking His face to see where He wants me next. It will be good to go home to see my family and reconnect with people at home. But I know that it won't be forever, that God will again call me forward into something else.

Please pray for me as I continue here and as I travel home. Please pray for me, that God will provide everything I need for travelling, financially, spiritually, physically. Pray that His peace will surround me and that I will receive all my strength from Him.

Blessings, and thank you for your prayers...